Recent Posts

Man-Boys with Nuclear Toys

by Invenium Viam on March 30, 2017

man-boys“… as I look at the End-Times scripture, this says to me that […] we are to understand where we are in God’s End-Times history.” Rep. Michele Bachmann


Former Congresswoman Michele Bachmann has said a lot of crazy things over the years that prove she’s uneducated about some subjects, dis-educated about others, and simply ignorant — by design or default — about still others. But that doesn’t mean she’s wrong. She may be right about these being the End-Times for planet Earth, for example, although like many conservatives she’s infrequently right for frequently wrong reasons.


I believe the world could very well end in our lifetimes, or even next month, but it isn’t because God has a plan to destroy the wicked and redeem the faithful. It’s because we human beings are driven by irrational beliefs and unreal objectives that cause us to create defective social orders and manage them with incompetent leadership systems. We often deny what’s factually and provably true (e.g., global warming) and believe wholeheartedly in the delusional (e.g., Jade Helm 15). Our leadership systems, by design or default, too often come to rely on exploiting human foibles to advance the careers of narcissistic and paranoid individuals within defective systems of governance, thereby to promote the delusional policies they espouse (e.g., the 18th Amendment). The only foundational difference between any system of human governance is whether it selects for control freaks who pass laws and sanctions against drinking, phucking and getting high, or selects for greedheads who pass laws and policies that serve their avarice and that of their friends. The worse systems of governance, of course, are those that select for a little of both — Control-Freak-Greedheads — and produce such murderous gems as Idi Amin, Shah Reza Pahlavi, and Saddam Hussein. No, it’s human faults and failings that will bring about the end of the world, not a vengeful God. The proof is readily at hand.


Take for example President Donald Trump and Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un, two extremely volatile, narcissistic and paranoid individuals who espouse a wide range of delusional beliefs and related policies. Or, as I like to refer to them, Man-boys with Nuclear Toys. Each believes he possesses magical powers. Kim Jong-un believes he was a child prodigy who could drive a car at age three and was winning yacht races at age nine. He got 11 holes-in-one his first time out golfing. He satisfies every woman he sleeps with multiple times before he even meets her. Oh, and he doesn’t ever defecate (maybe that’s why he’s so irritable). Donald Trump, on the other hand, is smarter than everyone else on the planet … about everything imaginable. He can make millions of Americans who watch Duck Dynasty believe ten impossible things before breakfast. He can close his eyes and make the world disappear. He can make Republicans defend his tweets, rants, and executive orders even though they really don’t want to. And he convinced half of the mass media prior to his election that his personal reality was the only reality that matters, who then awarded him half-a-billion dollars of free media and the presidency just for sh*ts and giggles.


It was a defective social order and ineffective leadership-selection system that put each of them in power and handed them the nuclear launch codes. We don’t need God to blow up the world; we can do that ourselves without needing help. We can only credit God with an earthly intervention if those two fail to blow up the world. Think of it this way: If you were to equip a pair of 9-year-old boys with fully loaded Glock 9 mm Semi-automatic pistols and send them out to play, and nothing bad happened, wouldn’t that prove the existence of God?


On the other hand, maybe Bachmann is right and God really does have a plan to destroy the world.


One of the reasons I continue to believe in the existence of God against all rational argument and absence of tangible evidence is that a belief in deity explains both human existence and organizational entropy. Absent a God to explain why everything good eventually gets cocked-up and goes south, like The Newsroom and Carnavale, human life is essentially meaningless. And meaninglessness is something we human beings by-and-large don’t tolerate very well. A fair percentage of folks go sideways real fast when confronted by: 1) Awareness of their mortality; 2) Within a meaningless universe. All of the seven deadly sins ultimately can be traced back to that deadly metaphysic. The human ego trips over its own dick and does a header into sex-and-drugs hedonism. Which ain’t a bad way to go, really, if the alternative is a life of quiet desperation or serving as the Mayor of Minneapolis. But I digress …


There’s nothing to say that even if we were able to prove beyond any doubt that the vast cosmos — including a moist, nasty fly-speck called Earth in a vast galaxy of 400 billion stars within an observable universe of 125 billion galaxies — is the creation of an all powerful Deity, that it therefore follows we should be able to suss-out what purpose that Deity had in creating us. As one of the instructors in my high school senior religion class put it, “God made man for His purposes, not ours.” I mean, even if God flushed away an entire galaxy with all the life it contains down a Black Hole, He’d still have 124,999,999,999 galaxies to play around with. And being All Powerful, he can burp a billion or ten more galaxies into the darkness-upon-the-face-of-the-waters whenever he happens to be a bit dyspeptic. Kinda puts the importance of human existence into a different perspective, doesn’t it?


And don’t back-sass me about your fancy science, either, cityboy. I prefer the lyrical poetry of a Petulant Hairy Thunderer creating the universe in six days to your sterile belief that the universe was created from an infinitely small, infinitely hot dot. You call that rational?


The statement that God made man for God’s purposes is kind of a mind-blower, if you let it sink in, which you shouldn’t, if you’re smart, since it involves attempting to divine the reasons why God’s purposes for us appear so very, very dark. At least, to me. Oh, I understand a lot of religious folks claim to have all the answers and will be happy to cite this or that verse in the Bible, or Veda, or Sutra, to explain it all. However, it’s wasted breath on me because: 1) I know those passages don’t mean what those other well-meaning, simple folks think they mean; 2) I know you can twist the words in scripture to mean just about any goddam thing you want; 3) A tribe of goat-herders who practiced casual incest, hadn’t yet discovered the zero-placeholder, and got their knowledge of God from chewing Syrian Rue ain’t a creditable citation for my article.


For me, the true test and honest work of examining my faith in the existence of Deity is to try to come to some kind of resolution on my own about some of the most fundamental questions: Does Deity exist? If so, were human beings personally authored by it? If so, can we also have a relationship with it? If so, what is the nature of that relationship (i.e., can we influence Deity to work on our behalf through good works, prayer, meditation, etc.). If we can influence Deity to work on our behalf, should we? The questions go on and on …


However, any such examination has to occur in light of what facts we know, or the outcome of enquiry is useless … and ultimately meaningless, tautologically-speaking. One of the facts we know beyond any question or doubt is that human beings are crazier than six rats in a coffee can. If you look at our behaviors as compared to nearly any of the other mammals that inhabit this planet — with the notable exception of wolverines — our species is inarguably gone F-F-B (Fully Freaking Batsh*t).


Take for example, the notion that nearly all of us do some kind of work for our daily bread, but nearly all of the wealth that we working folks generate goes to a very few individuals who are already so wealthy they would never have to work again for literally a million years and more. Seriously, if Bill Gates were to live off the principal of 84 billion dollars at the current US median income of $52,000 a year, his wealth would last 1,615,385 years not accounting for inflation and provided humanity doesn’t evolve into Land Squids or something icky like that in the meantime. Where’s the justice in that? That’s no kind of a rational economic system to live in, I don’t think.


So … why? Why would a loving, compassionate God create a bunch of crazy bastards with oversized sex organs and ego-centric libido’s, equip them with “free will” and plop them down on a perfectly nice planet to work things out on their own? Does that make sense to you? Why would a loving and compassionate God give human beings an oversized brain that is capable of all manner of self-aggrandizing fantasy, wild-assed misconceptions, and grandiose self-delusions and which quite frequently goes haywire for an astonishing variety of reasons both organic and inorganic? Why would God give human beings a male sex drive that is based primarily (and in some cases exclusively) on visual stimuli along with seminal vesicles that fill up and demand attention every 3-4 days on average? Why would God then match it with a female sex drive based on arcane and indecipherable rules of emotional gratification, a compulsion to collect knick-knacks, and a uterine cycle of 28 days? Why would God create a sexual dimorphism that favors males, together with a reproductive and endocrine system hardwired to override an already horribly inefficient executive brain function, in a nearly inoperative nascent forebrain that really doesn’t kick in too good anyway until a decade or so after they pass their sexual peak? And why would God have males reach their sexual peak at around age 15, when we are all certifiable by default and need constant adult supervision, and which serves a sex drive that starts to decline just as females reach their peak? Why, God, why?


God, I’ve become convinced, is all about having a big belly-laugh at our expense. “BWAAAAA-HAAAAAA-HAAAAAA-HAAAAA! Lookit whut dem crazy fuggers are doing NOW! BWAAAAA-HAAAAAA-HAAAAAA-HAAAAA!” It’s far better than cat videos on the internet, really. And it’s provably true. Put your ear close to the bung-hole of a fuel-oil tank and you can hear God laughing. Really, try it. It’s like kind of a miracle.


In that light, you begin to see that Michele Bachmann might be on to something with her whole End-Times belief. But God won’t be the prime mover in our ultimate destruction. We will.

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: